Good Karma

Be thankful, Belief, Faith, Freedom, Good karma, Growth, Helping, Helping others, Hope, Inspire, Kindness, Learning, Letting go, Pass it on, Self love, Share the love, Share yourself, Small steps, Spirituality, writing

Hi, how are you all. I have finally got my laptop fixed and so I am back writing after a while. Unfortunately I am not one of those people that can happily type away on a mobile. I am old school and I have to feel the touch of the keyboard, it is how I write and how I can maintain my flow. It feels good already. I always feel even closer to myself when I write and there is no better feeling. There is so much that I want to write about however rather than overwhelm myself I will practice what I preach and take it one step at a time, one blog at a time.

I want this first piece to be about karma however not the negative kind. Good karma and I would like to talk about how life and the universe is coming together with me and revealing itself. There is a lot to discuss so bear with me as I do like to go around the houses to tell a story. Hey, its what makes me me and I am good with it. There is a faith that I believe is missing with lots of people, I used to be one of them. Now when I say I used to be one of them, I mean I was always positive however at times of extreme difficulty I have not always possessed the ability to just simply have faith and believe that everything will turn out ok, turn out as it is supposed to. Until this year. Life really changed forever. I know I have experienced that many times, many different periods of growth, changes and increases of confidence and self esteem. This is different. This is real, genuine and certainly life changing and something so important that I want to share with you all.

I have written about this a couple of times however I know this will be something that will keep coming in to my blogs as it is so profound and so intrinsically part of my life now, part of me. This is spirituality, being at one with the world, with nature, with the universe rather than feeling like you are separate, alone and disconnected. Now I am no way a master on this, I know what I know based on my own experience of it and how I feel the world around me. I understand more now since I was drawn to reading and through my spiritual reading across different areas which also is an instrinsic part of who I am. Reading now also makes me feel more alive, more connected. I will keep doing what I am doing until I no longer enjoy it. I do not believe that you have to always keep at something just because you started it. Some things like some people are meant to come into your life for a period of time, everything does not and will not be forever and now I can happily say that I am at peace with this. I am sure in some areas this may not come as easy for me however I will take what I already know and feel and apply it to these other areas. I do not have to know everything and I do not need to know how things will turn out, if they will work out. I feel happy now to just do what I want, when I want with who I want. I don’t mean without a care in the world attitude, just having the freedom to be me in whatever way that is in the moment and being ok with that. I reiterate that I am no master of any of these and I do not have to be. Noone is a true master at anything, like no one is perfect. There will always be more to learn, more growth, more things to experience. You and I are ever evolving so we will never be a finished product. Why would we want to be? How boring would that be? To know everything already and have nothing left to learn. This is what I would equate to being a robot and I am not a robot.

I just realised that I have been writing away and I have not even mentioned good karma yet and that is ok. Writing, like life does not always go from one to 100 in a straight line, I may go up and down, to the side, high up then a few down or in whichever combination. It is what it is and I am what I am. I will get to it but for now I just want to write, to release, to speak and hopefully be heard. That is a new admission for me which I feel I need to stop at. This is where I would say (in my counselling work) “that sounds huge”. I feel it is. I am always listening. I like to talk when I feel comfortable to talk and with my friends this is easy however I still need to say outloud sometimes, anytime “I want to be heard”. “I want to be listened to and I want to be heard”. I have definitely got better in this area and will not just be quiet if a friend starts to talk when I am, I will assert myself and speak a bit louder. I used to get mad at conversations of this nature and with some people I have found it impossible. People are so wrapped up in themselves that they want to be listened to and they are however they do not then pass that back as mutual respect. I have started to think to myself after one of these conversations that I would love to say “it would be nice if you would now ask about me, what I am up to etc” This is really honest by me and in all of my years I have never said this outloud although I am accepting in myself that this is what I am feeling and thinking. If you have a conversation with someone in the street, at home, wherever and the other person gives you respect and time and space to talk a while and be listened to, please stop and think for a moment. Do not take advantage. Offer the same back. Ask them about themselves. They, I, may be a great listener but I would also like to be listened to. It is not about saying well Im not very good at listening, I think that’s a cop out. It is about the simple act of making someone else feel valid. We all want to feel validated by other people, it is innate.

If you feel like you have got something from someone, whether that be a simple but effective smile, a nice comment, a listening ear, someone asking you how you are or about your day please pass it on. If you feel like you received something, give something back. This is so valid across life in general. It is not our life, just for us as some people still think. We are all part of life. We are life and as such we need to look after it, to look after each other. Be there for one another. Now I guess I should talk about good karma or else I will have to change the title of this blog.

Since having the deep, inner belief that everything will work out and to let go and just allow life to be, the universe is really working with me. I went to Northumberland for half term and upon landing at Bardon Mill by train I realised that we were not in the right place I felt perhaps all my bus/train research had got a bit muddled. I needed to get to our YHA. There was a pub and nothing else. I went in to enquire and found out that to walk to the YHA would be a minimum of one hour, uphill and with a heavy rucksack, suitcase and my ten year old daughter in tow was a no no. After a lot of conversations with the lovely staff at the pub and another lady who said she would have driven us had she not been drinking already, one of the ladies working in the pub got her car and drove us to our hostel. From the moment I entered, I felt looked after and not alone. I had faith that we would get there and help came to hand. Whilst on the same trip, I was let off with money that I was short for the train and a free bus trip (the crazy AD122 bus journey,lets not go there). It was then that I felt more connected, not alone. I know for people it is really hard to believe that things will be ok, especially if they haven’t been for so long but trust me they will. Constantly hoping and praying it will be ok does not quite work the same. You have to learn to, as they say “let go and trust the process”. This is so true not just in counselling but in life. Once you surrender to what is and what will be, things seem to emerge in different ways. It is like the quote (sorry I don’t know the author of the quote) “when the student is ready, the teacher will appear”. So true. When you experience it for yourself you can say “I get it”. It all makes sense, it all slots together, naturally, organically the way it is supposed to.

I left my purse at home the other week and was stuck needing petrol to get me back home. No phone, no id, nothing. Whilst in the bank explaining my situation, hoping they would give me money without id, a lady came up to me and said “if they can’t give it to you, I will give you the money to get home”. I was really touched, she had heard my story. She heard me. Very powerful.

Thank you for all the people who think and feel that way and may they be a teacher to others who may not naturally be that way. We can all learn from each other. We just have to listen…..

With much love and hope

Sophie Marie xx

Never, ever give up

Belief, Emotional abuse, Hope, Inspire, Motivation, Never give up

It has been a challenging couple of days, mainly with the disbelief of some people’s comments. Like anything in life, when you need to talk about a certain issue or challenges that you are facing, there are the people who make you feel worse than you did originally and those that listen with empathy and understanding, giving you the reassurance that you need. I have been talking for a while about how strongly I feel about how more change is needed with the laws or lack of laws on emotional abuse. A change always starts with one person, one thought, one dream, one vision. No great change in the law or society was ever achieved with people constantly talking and never actually doing anything. People have heard me, heard my passion for this and I truly feel in my heart and soul that this is something that I am getting involved with. I do not need to know all of the details right now, I didn’t know how to set up a website and here I am and learning along the way. The most powerful lesson that I learnt recently is that you just have to start. Everything else is a bonus and everything else will fall into place with each step that you make.

You do not have to know all of the details before you start, you just have to start.

You do not need to know how you will achieve each step as you will learn this as you go along.

Your commitment and ultimately the passion that you hold so deeply inside will always be the driving force, it will always keep you going as this is your life blood which will never die. If you believe in something enough, you can do it. I am not saying I know the outcome of anything right now however in a way I do not care as I have the belief, I have my own belief and that of everyone in the world that in 2018 we all should be able to live without emotional abuse and that comments like “it’s just the way it is” is utter crap. One of the biggest things I say to my clients is “just because it has always been that way doesn’t mean it always has to”.

“Just because it has always been that way doesn’t mean it always has to”.

I know when I feel so strongly about something, so full of passion for something that I have to do it and I will do it, however long it takes. I wanted to have a career not a job and I made that my reality and studied to be a counsellor to fulfil my dream. I wanted my own counselling practice and I have it. I wanted to write and I write, I am writing a book and I am writing now on my own website and blog. I wanted to express myself and I do with everything that I do. I wanted to put myself out there for me and for everyone, to help and inspire and support and hopefully to make positive changes in the world. I hope I am achieving this. I wanted to paint and I paint. I wanted to create and I create. I wanted to start putting my art work out for people to see and to hopefully be inspired and have hope in achieving what you want in life. Working hard, believing in yourself and your vision(s), using the challenges you have experienced as positive tools to get you further to where you want to be.

Passion. Vision. Belief. Dedication. Hard work. Never, ever giving up. Ever. Ever. Ever.

When the going gets tough as it inevitably will, reach out for help and support. If this person doesn’t give you what you need or it is counterproductive for you then use that disappointment to propel you forward to someone else, something else that will help. You may feel like giving up at this point, when you feel like no one understands however what I have learnt is there will always be someone who understands and will help, you have just got to keep asking and reaching out. It is these negative experiences that are helping you, they are not the hindrance that you think they are. They are set up as a different kind of stepping stone, one that is loose and trips you up. It is by tripping that you come to realise the importance of what you are doing and how this has made you feel. It is giving you the emotion that you need to say “no that is not good enough”. If they don’t help, try someone else. It is like testing your commitment to your goals. If you stop at the first hurdle or loose stepping stone did you really want it in the first place? If you do have to stop, stop but just for a while until you get back on solid ground and find your footing again then put one foot after the other and go again. You will always have more strength, your strength is abundant. You just have to keep passing these little tests, step by step, minute by minute and they will all add up until one day you look back and say “wow, I did all that”. You can and you will.

Please do not feel that you are alone, there will always be people on your side, championing you and what you want to do, encouraging you to carry on, reminding you how strong you are and if you can not see them right now be that person for yourself and the rest will follow in time.

“Good things come to those that wait. The best things come to those that wait the longest”. Sophie Marie

 

Keep strong always, much love

 

Sophie Marie x